Personal

Advertising love…?

  

I don’t want to look like an hypocrite, saying stuff that are not true about me. Its because  I have been there and I can look back and see the changes and the diferent person that I am now.

I have been there. Not necessary saying (bragging about) things that weren’t true or real (or at least in the same area code), but specifically, waiting for something good to happen in order to post it on social media. Of course I was happy and grateful about whatever good happened to me, but it was like having more fun posting it out there!! Well, you have to give me credit too, I was just a kid with different priorities…

Now, I rarely use the social media, just to connect with friends (and find out what they are bragging about, LOL). Anyway, today is a
special day for me (and my better half) and looking back to our relationship I know that now I am truly happy that I have finally found  THE better half of me.  So, I’ve been thinking, are we actually happy? Cause we are not posting every day a new picture of us loving each other, on Facebook,  we don’t check in every weekend somewhere,  when we do something fun, enjoying each others company, etc. Is that the way to measure  the “happiness” and the “successfulness” of nowadays couples? Is it that we have arrived at the point when social media bragging is just a daily basis activity, that shows  us if we are successful or not? Is it living in a “sell-buy” world , now we need to advertise love in order to get a better self-esteem, to sell a better relationship/life ?

I read a few studies on this matter, and most of them say actually, that most of the people with  low confidence and self-esteem,  tend to boost their relationship / life  on social media.

Research from Albright College in Pennsylvania has revealed that individuals high in Relationship Contingent Self-Esteem – a type of low self-esteem centered on how your relationship is going – are more inclined to post affectionate content, such as posts acknowledging ‘the best boyfriend in the world’ or other declarations of happiness.”

I am not trying to be sarcastic, saying  that only phony people post stuff on Facebook. Its not true. As  MUHAMMAD ALI, said in 7 Steps to Bragging the Right Way “It’s not bragging if you can back it up” there are genuinely happy people that when something really important for them happens, its going to be posted on Facebook. But lets be honest, I am sure that I am not the only one that have those annoying friends that probably the only thing that they don’t post on Facebook is when they go to the bathroom! (Sorry for my French)

I happened to meet a few people that shattered my knowledge about real true love. And I am not talking about the ones that, around friends try to be the couple of the century,  I am talking about those, who in a completely strange crowd, or in the comfort of their own home and intimacy, they are the couple that share the love of the century!

Working in a restaurant a few hours a week, also gives me the opportunity to study people in different moments (as a intimate couple surrounded by careless strangers; or the couple surrounded by their friends or other family). I had a call for a reservation from a guy that made my day! He called for a reservation for their 15 years anniversary, and the way he talked about his wife, about organizing this surprise for his love, made my heart smile. That is true love, after 15 years I could still feel his love for his wife. You hink that 15 years is a lot? Hm, while a couple was waiting for their table (about 30 min) we alked about them and how much the enjoy doing different things together. And the way they talked about each other was so welcoming and warm, and I was a complete strange, that didn’t care about their perfect relationship. They were genuinely happy….  Every time they come, they are holding their hands, and stilling kisses from each other. They’ve been married for  47.  That is a strong love!

 So, back to my point – is advertising love a new thing today? Is it that nowadays,  flashing a perfect life story in the faces of our friends, the main thing to do? Wasn’t this the Disney’s fairytales job?   Cause its just getting depressing….. Seriously, It makes you wonder if you are the only one that doesn’t have a perfect life!but lets not forget that people usually post only  the best moments. So its kind of wrong to compare your “back stage” life with the “on stage” life of the others…  And we need to remember that nobody is perfect no matter how much they try to pretend to be on social media or even real life !!!

P.S. Even though I dont post pictures or stats that shows how happy I am, I i am really happy and in love right now!!! 🙂 just saying ….:) 

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Between past and future…

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It may sound out of this world or surreal but it’s actually the best day to think about that, and to realize that it is really happening! It’s just between two minutes, between two short seconds, that the whole year is changed, from 2014 we go to 2015! Just like that! Everyone thinks about the past year, and makes new targets and goals for the next one: be a better person; work twice as hard; help others; say more often that you love your close ones, etc.
I bet that it will be quite a story/book if someone will gather all the wishes and New Years Resolutions! I think it will be really inspiring.
It’s a really powerful day today! It changes a lot not only in the calendar, but also in our lives. I bet that if someone will do a research about when people tend to be better and more thoughtful , it will be at the beginning of the new year!

Today, for me, it three times a better day! It’s is New Years Eve – a day that I celebrate as good as I can! It’s my birthday – I am a New Years baby 🙂 and it’s also the day that I started a new episode in my life- I have a wonderful relation with my special person that I love so much! ❤️

It is a special day! And it should be one for everyone! It marks an ending and a new beginning, it makes you feel more powerful than ever! So let’s be happy on this day, and let’s enjoy every second of it!

Happy New Year!!

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Home Alone (II)

home sweet home
In order to be Home Alone 2, it hat to be Home Alone 1 first. Well, it was, three years ago, when my parents had a two week vacation in Italy – to visit my brother. Back then I didn’t put it here.

Now, they are in a great vacation visiting my sister – in USA, MA. God, I wish I could be there right now! They are with my sweet liitle goddoughter- my niece, participating at her baptism, having a great after church dinner… and the list can go on and on. More over I wanted to be with them, as this was their forst flight that long, with a connection flight in Vienna. I wanted to be with them during this amazing experience. Well, maby next time! I really hope that they will enjoy this trip, in order to understant why everyone loves USA! 🙂 and, as I heard from my sister, my father really like it! My father – the one that always says that nothing is better than his garden, his house, his country – his “home sweet home”!

Comming back to my Home Alone theme, I am staying home to take care of the household ! and it feels great! free time, fruits, healthy and fresh food, sunbath… everything I need right now!

Thats a sweet compensation for not being near the ones I love! Soon that day will come!

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Where do I begin… Do I?

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A few years ago, when I started this blog, or so-called blog I thought that at least 2 times per week I will write here about all my “issues” with the world. But guess what, I didn’t! Shame on you Lilia!!

Well, it was a tough period that passed, no free time, at least not enough for me, and I can find enough reasons or excuses not coming here too often. And to be fare, for more than one year I almost forgot that there is something like that. Any way, there is no excuse, not that I am trying to find any. Just, I guess that at this moment, the idea of saying something its growing on me.

Nowadays, almost everyone is trying to reach out to the world through blogging /internet. So am I. At least lets give another try, the third time is the charm. And it is not that I forcefully trying to do that, its just that I arrived at some point, that I want to speak to somebody, and i can’t. Not entirely.

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Back on the track…

It’s been a year… yeah, almost a year since I posted something on this blog. All this time I thought that this is another master plan that I don’t pull it till the end, because all those who know me a little, say that I never  do something all the way through.  Well, this proves that they are wrong! I do finish al that I have in my mind, it just takes some time…

Anyway, I’m back now, and I’ll try my best to make time to write every week. But to be clear, not that I have to demonstrate something to someone… but because I want it!

Stay tuned!

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It’s Time To Change!!!

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Today, there are many organizations, unions, and projects that are trying to make the world a better place for living, not only a place where people are living a little longer but also a place where the love, moral values, and respect are a priority for all. It’s funny, cause it is probably like 100 people per organization/project on this matter, but still, is far away from the fact that the world is a place that is similar to the one from their vision. There are still people that hate each other, people that fight, people that are malicious. Anyway, in my country there is a saying: “There is no forest without sick trees” and maybe even if we could have one  person per one project, still it won’t be heaven on earth. That doesn’t mean that we can’t fight and dream for that to happen.

Actually, the more I think about it, the more I realize that this subject has no ending, and I am not trying to do something that no one can – to end it. The thought to write something about this came from the time I was in elementary school. About then I wrote a different story, but with a similar problem- a better living for human kind. That story, which I lost, unfortunately, was about people from my country, which are “forced” to leave the country in search for a better living. “Emigration – a pleasure or a necessity” that was the name of that article, and I remember that back then I was supportive to the necessity term for the emigration cause. Word, that right now, I am not that sure that I would use it. I didn’t travel a lot and I don’t have so much experience that gives me the right to say that, but still, I think that none of the words that I used back then is the right one, not the one I would use now at least. Sure, the temptation to go abroad is very acute right now, especially for the Third World countries, nut this is not the only option. I am not here to judge them or their reasons but I think that the main reason for the mass emigration is the cowardice and laziness. I still think that if you really want to do something, to accomplish a dream you can do it everywhere, all you have to do is to fight and to believe in it and in you. Of course, depending on the situation and objectives it may be a little harder, but not impossible!

I also had the thought of leaving my country, which I still do, but not because I want to live better in a different place, where people are more virtuous and kind, but to get more and different professional education and then to  come back here to apply all that I have learned. To help to make the change for the place that raised me, in name of my family and friends. Everyone wants to go somewhere else where apparently the moral values are met, where the economy is helping all the population from there. However, thinking about this, how do you think that they got this far? How do you think they have all that they have now, that draws you in? They had to work a lot at the beginning, side by side, and not to run away letting all that on others. That’s why I used the word: “coward”!

All we have to do is to start the change! Cause it’s already the time for that! It’s been too much time, and no one did nothing! We have to stop thinking about “Me “and to think about “Us”.  In this context, I don’t think about changing the world by magic to make something impossible!  All that I am talking it’s about us, about our behavior, our values and respect of others. That’s a good way to start! If you will respect others, they will respect you as well. I know that this is hard to believe, but only the faith in this is going to give the strength for that – to fight with the indifference! Try to say “thank you” every time you have the chance, try to say please and welcome to everyone, try to smile as much time you can, start to care about the people surrounding you, try to shine that happy light and send it on!   Sure, this will take a while, but with every minute that you spend being nice to someone, helping people surrounding you, you can destroy the seed of disbelieve and people will start to change! There is no way that someone can be so malicious with the person that treats him nice for so long. It will pass a while and things will start changing, and he will start to be nice, but that means that we have to try each day. Maybe a little bird can bring the sun and the spring. I am sure that with one little action the chain reaction will never stop and it will bring the change that we need!  I know that it takes a little spark to start the fire, so let’s start the fire that will bring the change to the world. If we take the chances, we can change it. Just imagine all that we could do for our world… all that YOU could do for the world you live in!!!

P.S. the song that I attached to the post it’s very significant for this subject! Just try to listen it and to try understand it!!!

Categories: Personal, Social Point | Tags: , , , , , | 1 Comment

Job seeker vs Job bidder

new job position

Like everyone, after graduation, I tried to find a job. The good days when I was a student that parents were supportive (in the financial way) are over.  In this search, that is still going on, I was overwhelmed by diversity of employers, they offer, terms, and conditions. Here are some of the impression on this topic, mine and some friends of mine, too.

Sure, I did try to find something corresponding to my degree, cause I didn’t study all these three years for nothing. Well, guess what- today only a few employers are interested actually in your degree and your studies. Now the important thing is the experience, and usually, is three years experience in similar position. And after all those after-application interviews, I started to be allergic to expression ”three years experience in similar position” Where can a just-now-graduated  find those three years  if he/she can’t get a job without it. So for now, it seems that finding a job it’s a very twisted thing. The best way to say this, probably will be like this:  you need to get a job (which is unlikely, without any experience),  to gain the  right experience for the position  you actually  want, and is not that sure that you will be actually hired at the end…

Yes, probably is a game of words all that I said just now, but for me was something real! I don’t say that I don’t have any experience, cause I do have, but it’s just that according to some of the employers that interviewed me, is not the right one or not long enough. Yeah, sure! I have been student for three years, so if I could have found a profile-job at the time that I was only a freshman, (that’s even more impossible than it is now ), at the time of the graduation, I would have  the right experience.

So, according to these little theories of mine: Finding a good job- it’s not going to  happen in the near future!

However, this is not all. It seems like some of my friends found a job, even with a little experience. So I think: where is the catch? Well, it wasn’t a real job, after all. You see,  they realized that at the first,  is impossible with, no experience,  to get a job according to your degree, so let’s find one that doesn’t need too much experience, like a secretary, for example. They applied for it, and on the interview they realized that it wasn’t what they looking for. Sure for that job they didn’t need any experience, nevertheless, they needed short skirts and high heels …   The weirdest thing is that these job opportunities were published on a visited employment website. So I wonder, what to expect next? The state employment agencies to recruit for these positions?  That I’ll have to see……

Other employers, that realize that to hire someone that has good knowledge and experience in the specific field, is more unlikely, So they have a different  solution for that. But even here, not all understand that solution in the right way. Most of the big companies, before hiring an employee, they make them  pass two or three stages. First one, it’s  the CV application. Here the job seeker   finds the prospective employer. Then, is the interview stage, that helps the employer to figure out if the CV is Based on real information and facts, or just the person in front and the one from the paper are two different persons. So far so good! Now, on the third stage,  the training or probation period, each company is applying the “Indoor rules” and the employment process is getting different one from the other. So, there are companies, that treats the candidates not to good and at the end of the process, those who didn’t get the job, are, on the other side, relived… Of course, I understand that you can’t take care of all candidates, especially when we talk about a big number. But I think, actually I am convinced, that the employer needs to treat the candidates even better than the clients. Just think about it for a second. When you want to fix your car, your are searching for an Auto Service that it’s good and trustworthy. And if you have two options to chose: the first one – a former client told you that they didn’t fix the steering wheel to well, so he advise you not to go; or the second Auto Service: an ex prospective-employee, that tells you that the service is not too good, he worked there for a while, and he knows it! In this case I am sure that you’ll chose the  first Auto Service, that couldn’t fix only the steering wheel, not the one that has the entire service broken. You’ll not chose this one, because a former employee knows better what really happens there! So that’s why I think that it’s really important to treat the applicants very well, cause they can influence very well the clients.

Too bad that the company that hired me for a probation period doesn’t know that. What can I say, at the beginning was ok, the key to my employment in that company was to find more clients to buy their services. It was clear from the beginning, that I am not going to be paid for this time and  if I won’t bring enough clients, I’ll have to find another job. It was ok, I was agree. The time that I was in the office, the people  from there were  treating me nice, but still, it was different… not that friendly as they appeared to be with the clients or between them. Well, I thought that it was like this because I’m new.  They told me to provide them with a database with clients from my phonebook that corresponding to the clients profile. That’s odd… I don’t have friends that can be their clients. So I guess that from the start I was doomed. But I didn’t give up, I started to search new clients. Then I realized that I don’t have a place to work. It was a small desk in the corner, to fit a notebook – so no chance to invite the clients, that I hardly found, to my desk. It’s ok with that, too. Maybe after they will decide to hire me, they will find me a desk.  Time was running, but I didn’t get the chance to have enough clients, I had only a couple of them.  So I was expecting to not be approved. But guess what, I didn’t expect to “ get fired” over the phone…. It’s like getting dumped over the phone or even worse in a small note left on the table.  Honestly, I did not expect this from a big company in their field. I think it would have been  nice to let me know about their decision in the office like they really care. Now I think that is better to hire someone only for a probation period, to not pay a penny for it, and to get you new clients. It’s pretty convenient, right? Sure, I can make them a bad publicity, (don’ get me wrong, I am not doing this now) and  they can lose the confidence of a few clients…. But then again, it’s pretty obvious that this is not the main concern of the employer.

Categories: Marketing Point, Personal, Social Point | Tags: , , , , , | 1 Comment

Why greenstroke ?!?!

Maybe for someone this would be an odd name for a personal blog, and to be honest it is a little odd even  for me… So why I chose this one? Very simple I didn’t have a choice!  Actually  I wanted to name my blog “standpoint“, but it was unavailable(From where so much luck!! 🙂 ). So  I needed  to find another one, cause I didn’t want to be that simple, like using my first and last name.  I started to think about possibles choices, so I come up with a couple of words in my head. I chose the ” stroke ” word cause it seemed to have some connection with my first idea. I know it is a little rough  (I  don’t know if is the right word to say…), but i needed that; I need something tough  to get any attention from the world surrounding me… Actually we live in a harsh world, so maybe is needed more sensitivity from us, but I think that only something has to be strong enough to be able to change the whole world.

Why ” green ” ?… It’s not that I am a “green person” or that I advertise  some “Go Green” Organization (even that they have all my support!), it’s because this color is very significant, it has a lot of meanings, and I like it. Green is the  ” go ahead and do this or say this ” color, is the color of permission. Maybe I chose this color ” in memoriam”  of freedom of speech in my country …

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Hello world!

I am trying to make a blog here… Well if you are seeing this, I gues i did it! I just Hope to do well in what i have in mind…

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